December 20, 2004

Monday I've got Friday on my mind...

Today's the last Monday of the year for me at work. My day is filled today with tidying up loose ends, finishing off languishing projects and making sure I'll have a clean start when I get back in January.

Your mum's at home this week. She's doing much the same thing at home as I am at work. She's painting things and cleaning, getting the house ready for our guests. For your guests.

You see, apart from the fact that Lovely Lorraine and Jonny are coming to visit us at Christmas, for their first taste of Australia, there are other guests on the way.

Your grandparents, pumpkin, are coming to see you.

Now, let it be said here that I dearly love both your grandfather and your grandmother. That they have consistently shown me acceptance, genorosity and kindness. That they have welcomed me (along with my entire family) into their hearts and their home.

I'm terrified.

What if I'm not doing it properly? Heaven forbid they will decide I'm not being a proper husband or father-to-be. They might take Eve away.

What if your grandfather doesn't think I'm going to be a decent dad? What happens then?

It's all very scary, pumpkin, very scary indeed. I'm not sure that I'm really equipped for this.

Which brings us to the whole question. Am I prepared to be your dad? Certainly I'm trying to get ready for it, but I'm not sure that I'm going about this the right way.

In any case, I love you.

No comments: